Crazy Bitch Read online

  “I was there, until I was told to leave because you killed another one of their wolves. What the fuck are you trying to pull, Arys? You’re going to ruin everything with them.” Because he wasn’t taking me seriously, I slammed him against the bar again, this time adding a little power push to it, one meant to hurt.

  His smirk faded, replaced with a glare that promised wicked things. “Are you sure you want to do this? Now? Here?”

  Willow rose and touched my arm. “Whatever this is about, this is not the place to handle it. There are many eyes on you right now.”

  “Good,” I snarled. “Then they can all see for themselves that I’m sick of taking shit. From everyone.”

  Arys laughed in my face, a harsh noise filled with venom. “Are you now? I don’t suppose you’ve gotten sick of starting it.”

  My hands burned, and my hair blew as a gale force wind tore through the place. “I’m not the one who’s about to start a fucking war with the wolves. What the hell are you thinking, Arys?”

  The power ripped through me, echoing in Arys. In a blink his blue eyes were wolf. He gripped the edge of the bar but made no effort to shake me off. His composure was still better than mine.

  “That’s the thing, I guess. I’m not thinking. Just doing. You know the feeling, don’t you?” His pointed comment was meant to sting, and it did. Still, he didn’t stop there. “Perhaps if you weren’t so dedicated to driving us both mad, we wouldn’t be having these little control issues.”

  I had been certain my anger couldn’t grow any greater, but it did. Power lashed out from me like a lightning flash, slapping Arys as I slammed him against the bar one more time. “You think you can blame me for what you’ve done? Well, that’s convenient.”

  Willow’s touch became a grab. He jerked me away from Arys and stepped between us. “This is not the place to have this discussion. All you’re doing is showing every vampire here that you can be divided. Now take it elsewhere.”

  His tone left no room for argument. Not that I wanted to engage Willow. His red eyes shone with a malevolent spark. I hated it so much that I didn’t wish to encourage it.

  With great reluctance I nodded and dropped my hold on the emotionally-charged energy I held ready. This was far from over. My night and my alliance had been ruined because of Arys. No way was I letting this go as if it were no big deal.

  Arys gestured to the door. “After you, my wolf. Lead and I will follow.”

  I was so overcome with a rage that knew no bounds that I almost forgot what I’d needed to talk to Willow about. “Salem. I need to speak with him. Is there any way you can make that happen?”

  Willow’s expression became one of skepticism. He considered my request with a head shake. “I can’t. But I know someone who may be able to help. I’ll see what I can do. Now get out of here. Go work your shit out.”

  “Thank you.” Because there was nothing else I could say or do, I stormed out of the building with Arys hot on my heels.

  Too angry to consider driving, I headed away from the building, down the street. Arys matched my pace, sliding glances my way, waiting for me to boil over again. He thrummed with readiness for the conflict, as if he’d been waiting for the moment when we would go head to head.

  Well, now he would have it. Two blocks away, in the empty parking lot of a law office, I stopped and faced him. “How could you do it again, Arys? You know what this alliance means to me. Dayne is pissed. He’s threatening to wage war on all vampires unless I find the guilty party and hand him over within forty-eight hours.” Trying to stay calm made my voice tremble and my hands shake.

  Arys crossed his arms and regarded me with love and hate warring in his eyes. “That’s a war he can’t win, and we all know it. Fuck him.”

  Arys’s flippancy was severing my last nerve. The sound of nighttime traffic was lost as we stared at each other. I heard nothing and saw nothing but him and the arrogance on his handsome face. It made me want to screw him as bad as I wanted to punch him. Confusing, to say the least.

  “Fuck him?” I repeated, my voice shrill. “Shaz is part of that pack now. If you start a war, then he becomes our enemy. Do you not get that? You’re putting his life at risk.”

  “Shaz can take care of himself. Stop doubting him.” Arys’s lack of reaction was infuriating. The smile that played about his lips revealed that he knew it too. He was trying to make me lose it.

  My hands clenched into fists. Why was he doing this? “I want this alliance. Why are you trying to take it from me?”

  Arys made a disgusted noise and took a step toward me, closing the gap I’d put between us. “You know damn well this has nothing to do with your alliance. This is about you. I can’t get you out of my head. Every night that I’m not with you, every damn day you’re not in my bed, it just gets worse. I can’t take it anymore, Alexa.” By the time he said my name, he was near shouting. Right in my face. With accusation in his eyes.

  I threw the punch before I realized it was happening. I hadn’t meant to, but it felt so damn good.

  Arys rubbed his jaw and scowled.

  “Do you think this is easy for me?” I shouted back, all rational thought vanishing like mist. “I can’t escape you even when I try. Since I died, you’re always there. So deeply embedded in every part of me. There is nothing left in me but you. Always you. And I can’t take it anymore either.”

  Needing to unleash the overflow of angry emotion, I kicked a nearby garbage can, sending it flying. It bounced and rolled through the parking lot, offering me no solace.

  Arys moved fast. Grabbing me by both arms, he kissed me, a violent, aggressive kiss that screamed with pain. “You taste like Shaz,” he murmured. “Guess I’m not the only one with a taste for wolf blood.”

  His attitude dripped antagonism. We would never find peace with each other when we enjoyed the conflict as much as we hated it. There was that double-edged sword of the twin flame bond. We were as fucked as Lilah and Salem, as Ozzie and Rachel.

  “You’re the only one who enjoys killing them,” I spat, shaking him off. He made as if to reach for me again, and I warded him off with a raised hand, fingertips dancing with blue and gold sparks.

  Arys nodded, doing his best to look tragic. It was all for show. He had that glint in his eyes that he always got when purposely stoking the flames of my temper. “Not them. Just you. I enjoyed killing you. The others, they’re just a way to kill time.”

  A chill stole over me. His words echoed in my ears. I couldn’t believe he’d said them. I knew him, and I knew he was trying to goad a reaction out of me.

  There remained one thing I didn’t know. “Why are you doing this?” My voice wavered as several emotions fought for dominance. “What are you hoping to achieve by being an asshole?”

  Arys took a step toward me, ignoring my raised hand, inviting attack. “You know why.”

  “Actually, I don’t. So stop fucking with me and just spit it out.” I gave him a warning shot when he pressed closer, just enough to shove him back a few feet.

  He came right back, grabbing my hand this time and inviting the aggressive force I pushed into him. With a pained growl, Arys stood his ground, taking the assault and loving it.

  “It’s all I’ve got left.” His declaration was made with a flash of wolf fangs that froze me in place. “I’ve tried being patient. I tried not to crowd you. Hell, I even tried to lure you back into my bed with the pup. There is nothing I can do to break down this barrier you’ve built between us. And it’s breaking us both down. Maybe if I piss you off enough, I can get you to work out some of your issues so we can finally move on.”

  The appearance of my wolf in Arys didn’t usually happen so easily, and never so fully, especially not if I’d shifted recently. Perhaps the most unsettling part was that he seemed oblivious.

  “You think violence is the answer?” I shook my head, unable to see the logic in that. “Sounds about right.”

  “No, I think fucking you senseless is the answer, but yo
u don’t seem to agree.” Arys pulled me against him, hard. “So violence it is.”

  Darkness smoldered in his eyes. I tumbled into those midnight orbs, having no more immunity to his pull than I ever did. He draped me in his allure, using our shared power against me. I could break his spell, though it wouldn’t be without effort.

  I licked my lips as I gazed up at him in smitten wonder, momentarily flustered. He was using our thrall like a weapon. This wasn’t a trip into the pleasure zone. It was an attack. I’d used it myself, several times on several people.

  It was like trying to run under water. That same massive resistance greeted me as I fought my way through. What made it hard was how good it felt to be rolled by him. The temptation to succumb was strong, but I knew I had to resist. Arys was up to no good.

  Then Arys dropped his thrall as fast as he’d put me under, leaving me raw and cold. “I am not the only one making dangerous decisions. Have you considered the impact your actions have on you? On us? Some might call it lunacy.”

  “Have you?” I shot back. In the sudden absence of that loin-stirring, blood-rushing sway, I was icy, emotionless but for the still seething fury in the pit of my stomach. “Wait. Are you saying that fucking Falon made me crazy?”

  “No, it makes you dangerous. Hungry for power greater than your own. Fucking Falon makes you a Harley Kayson vampire, like the rest of our bloodline. Fucking Sinclair made you crazy.” This he said with that sly smirk that I both loved and hated. Arys knew all the right buttons to push with me, and he took great pleasure in that.

  Gritting my teeth made my jaw ache. Knowing he wanted me to snap made me fight that much harder to ensure it didn’t happen. “Well, you didn’t fuck him so what’s your excuse for being such a head case?”

  The constant storm in Arys’s eyes lit up like a lightning flash. I knew the right buttons to push too. Two could play this game. By trying to set me off, Arys was only running the risk of unleashing his own inner pain and rage.

  He reached to twist a long blonde lock around a finger. A growing cyclone of emotion swirled around him. “It’s always been you. You’ve haunted me for over a hundred years. That would make anybody a little mad.”

  Something shifted in Arys. I felt it. Releasing my hair, he reached for my neck where he traced the outline of the very spot he’d bitten me the night he killed me. I shuddered as fear joined my fury. Though no mark remained, I felt it like I had died only yesterday.

  The way he fixated on me put me on the defensive. No way in hell was I taking a trip down memory lane and reliving that tonight.

  “Stop looking at me like that,” I snapped, hoping to break him out of the past. “You get everything you want. My life. My death. You took Kale from me. When will it be enough for you?”

  That shook him from the zone he’d slipped into. “I did what I had to do to protect you, to protect us. I will always do what it takes no matter who gets in my way. I’m not sorry. I can never be sorry, and you have no right to expect it.” When I recoiled, shoving away from him, he grabbed tight and held fast, refusing to let me go. “He was a distraction, Alexa. Just another obstacle to overcome.”

  “I know that,” I heard myself shout, hating the truth that burst free. “But I love him. I hate myself for it, but I do.”

  Arys’s grip never slipped as I struggled to push him away. He rested his forehead on mine until I calmed. “And that is why I didn’t kill him.”

  A part of me shattered. I’d been carrying this grudge for Arys, wanting to punish him for sending Kale away, for making that decision for me. But he had just revealed that his love for me was greater than his desire for vengeance.

  I was torn. A part of me despised Arys for still managing to come out on top, for proving he was so much more than he seemed. Yet my other side needed to cling to him, to break down the walls between us and be whole again. Confusion reigned.

  “Let me go, Arys,” I said, again feeling the need to run from him. To just be…away.

  “No. You can’t keep shutting me out. This shit has to stop.” From calm to furious in seconds, Arys was showing signs of bearing the burden too long as well.

  “What has to stop is you killing the Doghead wolves. I don’t have much time to find a vampire to hand over to him. So give me some space so I can clean up your mess.” Just that easy and the rollercoaster of emotions climbed the mountain of rage yet again. This ride sucked.

  Arys stepped back and flung his arms up in outrage. “Tell Dayne it was me. I don’t give a shit. In fact, I’ll go tell him myself.” He turned and stormed away, leaving me gaping after him.

  “Like hell you will,” I shouted, throwing a psi ball that took his feet out from beneath him. I was ready to throw another if he didn’t abandon that stupid idea. His sense was not making his decisions, apparently. “Do you know how much worse the war will be if Dayne finds out it was you? Think about the hell that will break loose. You’d be risking Shaz’s life, and I won’t let you do that.”

  His wicked laugh stirred the longing within me. I rubbed my arms as if that would wipe away the sensation.

  Arys got up, still chuckling. “There’s the fire I was looking for,” he said, pleased with himself. “So that’s what it takes to make you explode. Good.”

  Having found my breaking point, Arys headed down the street, back toward The Wicked Kiss. When I threw the next psi ball, he turned and caught it, absorbing the energy it contained. He left me no choice but to run to catch up.

  “Arys, don’t you fucking dare push me on this. It’s not a game.” I shouted the words at his back. Was he going to make me tackle him?

  “You’ve got that right. This is no fun at all. I’d much rather be making mad, passionate love to you. Since you’d rather do everything the hard way…” He turned to face me, walking backwards, and held up both hands as if to say ‘whatever.’

  I couldn’t even entertain the thought of Dayne finding out it was Arys. Instinct told me that would immediately bring about the worse case scenario. Right now Dayne thought it was some random vampire. If he knew it was my vampire, there was no telling what he might do, but it would certainly involve the destruction of the precarious coexistence between the vampires and werewolves in this city.

  Arys’s remark that it was a fight the wolves couldn’t win was something I agreed with. Dayne might be willing to put people like Izzy and Shaz at risk, but I wasn’t. There were kids in that pack, sheltered from the harsh adult aspects of the beast but still at risk just the same. No, if Dayne knew the most powerful vampire in the city was killing his wolves in an attempt to relive my death, he would go to any length to hurt us. He might even hurt Shaz to do it.

  This thought burned in me, filling me with desperation. Would Arys really risk such destruction just to force me to go through the twisted form of therapy he thought I needed? Yes. Without a doubt yes, he would.

  “So you’re going to go to Doghead and tell Dayne you’re the one hunting his wolves?” I snarled. “And then what?”

  Arys shrugged. A muscle twitched in his cheek as he tried to refrain from laughing again. “I guess that’s up to him. He’ll probably try to kill me. Then I’ll kill him. And we’ll take over the pack. How does that sound?”

  “It sounds like you’ve lost your mind.”

  “I guess you would know.” He winked and turned back around, quickening his pace.

  If he’d been anyone else, I’d have called his bluff. But this was Arys, and he didn’t waste words on bluffs. He would do exactly as he’d said.

  “You’re really starting to piss me off.” I was seething. Keeping the peace with Doghead was vital right now. Deep in my being I knew we needed to save that alliance.

  “Good,” he quipped, flashing me a smile that oozed arrogance. “Do something about it.”

  That did it. The cocky attitude drove me over the edge. With a frustrated cry I lashed out with a blast that threw Arys into the side of an empty bus shelter. He stayed pinned there, held in place by my s
heer will alone.

  His expression was expectant, welcoming, even when I threw another punch at him. It should have stopped there, but the well was overflowing, and it all came pouring out. As I threw punch after punch, I screamed, shouted, cried.

  “You won’t be happy until you take everything from me, will you? Until there is nothing left but your voice in my head. I am defenseless against you, against everything you are. I can’t take it anymore.” My fists slammed into Arys’s face so many times I lost count. I couldn’t stop myself. Unleashing weeks worth of pent up emotion felt so damn good.

  Blood dripped from his nose. The scent of it climbed inside me and rolled around, taunting me. He took every hit without so much as a grunt. Yet the full moon reigned in both of us, and the wolf couldn’t bear to stand defenseless. When Arys snapped it was with a growl so vicious it brought out my beast. I was all wolf fangs and claws when he shoved me off him.

  I hit the ground, barely feeling it as adrenaline drove me. He didn’t wait for me to get up. He lunged forward and grabbed me, dragging me up. I never had a chance to get my feet under me before he slammed me into the bus shelter.

  “Is this what you wanted, Alexa?” he growled into my face, baring wolf fangs as deadly as my own. “Is this what you need to finally move on?”

  In that moment we were both hybrids, each possessed by two monsters intent on one thing: destruction.

  “What I need is for you to get out of my face.” Because it was impossible to make a fist with claws, I slashed at him instead, slicing a gash across his cheek. I followed up with a metaphysical attack meant to burn from the inside out.

  Arys’s hold loosened as he fought the vicious hand of his own power. Our power.

  “I’m telling him,” he gasped out, straining to keep me pinned in place while the deadly force tore through him. “I’m telling Dayne the truth. It always comes out one way or another.”

  I wasn’t trying to kill Arys. There wasn’t a single part of me that wanted to. It would be like killing myself, something I also had no interest in. What I did want, though, was to make him hurt, to make him sorry he pushed me this far with his antagonistic ways and his hotheaded decisions. The dam broke on everything that had been tormenting me since the night I died. The walls came down, as they had to.